Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Wherein The Ocelot And Her Husband Converse About The Dark Arts.

After a very bad day for the ocelot and her Husband (including tomfuckery at his job, a bad day at hers, her trying to go to a coven meeting that was not happening although Trothwy had said they weren't meeting this week because she is now incapable of remembering anything, and a flat tire that couldn't be replaced because it was seven-thirty before said tire could be tended to), the following conversation was had.

ME: Um, about "Abre Camino". Y'know, the road-opening thing. Apparently this can get kinda rough.

HIM: Hm. You put that stuff on my boots, didn't you?

ME: (somewhat defensively) You watched me do it.

HIM: Yeah. That Santeria stuff doesn't fuck around. Anything else you bought at the botanica that I might want to know about?

ME: Um...John the Conqueror root. (pompously) Traditionally Hoodoo. And Voodoo. Not Santeria.

HIM: Let's confine ourselves to one magical system at a time, shall we?

ME: Pfft. It's fine. (rationalization ensues)

HIM: Yeah, how are you going to feel if your day tomorrow is like the one I had today? It's like the Universe took its bulging cock and slapped me across the face with it and said (drops voice to a dirtily seductive tone), "Hey, look at this."

ME: I am so putting this on my blog.

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