Tuesday, February 14, 2012

New Year, New You - Prompt, "Lessons".

I've learned that some people actually read what I'm writing, and are interested (or perhaps just so horrified that they can't stop reading) in what I think about things.

I've learned that magic and the everyday are not separate for me, and not just in the slackass, "everything is maaaagickul!" way, either.

I've learned that outside motivation is damn near critical for me, and I dislike this about myself. I'm trying to figure out how to change this.

I'm nowhere close to where I want to be with my goals, but at least I haven't thrown up my hands and just given up. I may be plodding forward and/or moving erratically towards goals, but at least I'm moving. As for where I would like to be - well. I'd like to be at the barn four days a week, gainfully employed somewhere that doesn't crush my soul and make me consider homicide, doing my stuff with my training circle again, actually observing all esbats and sabbats, and maybe pursuing BTW a bit more diligently (or at least hanging out with Evn and Trothwy more than every four months). It's a tall order, I know. On the one hand, having a long to-do list motivates me, but it can also make me look at it, sigh "fuck it", and retreat to the computer to see what interesting stuff I can find on the net.

I'll give myself this next week or so off - I have a houseguest in a few hours (who's staying at least a week), and I know I won't get as much done while they're here. But then, Shoulder To The Wheel, Part 2.

1 comment:

  1. Thank you for being part of this Experiment, I'm so glad to have gotten to know you better (and the word "slackass" ;p). You've made good progress in the right direction!